Beginning a Family
When Steve and I were first married we wanted nothing more than to have a family. We were married in November and by January had made the decision to let nature take its course and have a child. After two years of doctors visits and medications and not fun tests we learned in April 2008 that we were not going to be having any children the easy way (if there is an easy way!)
After lots of praying and fasting in April 2009 we decided to attempt an IUI. By the end of May I was pregnant! And by the end of June I had miscarried the pregnancy- three children that I would not get to meet. We tried two more IUIs that also resulted in miscarried pregnancies, the last of which was in February 2010. We were devastated at the outlook but took comfort in knowing that at least we had each other.
Then in March 2010 an amazing thing happened- Steve turned 30! I still don't know why this became the magic age or why that day was set to change our lives forever but after our celebration of his birthday while in the car driving home we looked at each other and knew, we needed to adopt a baby.
The Process
Over the next week we re-did all of our research that we had done many times before, were given the promise of money to make it happen and decided to move forward with an adoption. We chose
A Guardian Angel Adoptions after a lot of prayer and research. We met with them on April 6 and turned in all of our paper work. We worked on getting everything else done and had our home study on May 5. We were approved to adopt and started hearing about situations almost instantly.
The process was simple but heart breaking too! Each time a birth mom was ready to choose a family Chris would call us and tell us about the situation and we would have to make the decision if we wanted our profile to shown or not. We had our profile shown about 15 times and denied having our profile shown once. Each of those 15 times we got a phone call letting us know that we had not been chosen. Some times it took longer and some times it was fast. We went as far as having a phone call with one birth mom that ultimately decided to place their baby with the other family.
July 4th weekend was especially hard. We got a phone call Friday evening late letting us know that a baby had been born extremely premature and that we were one of two families that could be chosen for the baby if we wanted our profile shown. We moved forward getting updates about the baby every few hours. On Monday, July 5 we learned that the baby was not ours. We were devastated! The next baby that was due wasn't due until late August and we doubted we would get that one too!
The Phone Call of a Lifetime
July 8th was a Thursday and it started out like any other day. Steve and I went to work and then came home to make plans for a trip with my family to a friends cabin for the weekend. At 9:00 PM I was on the phone with my dad making arrangements for the weekend when my cell phone rang- it was Chris! I hung up from talking to my dad and Steve answered the call from Chris. She told us that a baby had been born that night that was an African American Boy. The mom had a C-section earlier in the day. The baby weighed 7 pounds 9 ounces and was healthy. The mom had thought she was due on October 3 and had just arrived. The baby however was 38 weeks along and needed to come due to low amniotic fluid. After Chris told us about the baby I asked her how many other people were going to get a chance to have the baby. I felt something different about this baby than I had the others and didn't want to be disappointed again. She said "Well, that depends on if you want your profile shown. If you do, then none, the baby is yours!" If you could have been a fly on the wall in our tiny office at 9:15 PM on July 8 you would have seen the two happiest people on the planet! We had a son!!
Getting our Baby
We quickly made some phone calls to work and the new grandparents and family members. My parents came to our house and we went to Wal-Mart to pick up some essentials. I have no idea what we bought that night but I do know that my feet were not touching the ground as I ran through Wal-Mart buying a diaper bag, formula, diapers and who knows what else.
We were instructed to be at Jordan Valley Hospital the next day so that we could meet our son. Steve and I went out to breakfast that morning at the Red Rooster Waffle Company and waited for the phone call with instructions. They finally came- be there at 2:00 PM with lunch for Keisha- Burger King: a Whopper with no onions, fries and a Dr. Pepper.
At 2:00 PM we met our case worker Jodi. She gave us some instructions and we went in the room to meet Keisha and Anthony for the first time. When we got to the room we gave Keisha her lunch and introduced ourselves. We also gave Keisha a necklace from Brighton that my mom and sisters had purchased earlier that day. Keisha asked the nurse to go get the baby. When the nurse arrived with the baby I remember thinking how cute he was and how lucky I was to be his mommy. The nurse handed the baby to Keisha and I will never forget what she said, "Okay baby, I love you but your mommy and daddy are here now and they need to take care of you now. They are going to be wonderful parents, you are very lucky. Be good, I love you!" With that Keisha handed me Anthony Benjamin Carlson for the first time.
Steve and I sat with our case worker Jodi, Keisha and her case worker Cindy in the room for about 2 hours talking and getting to know each other. Many times during those 2 hours we were all in tears as we all knew that Anthony truly was ours. We all also knew that there were a lot of people from the other side in that small hospital room that day making sure that Anthony got were he needed to be. Jodi said later that she had never felt the spirit so strong at a placement and that she had never known before that her brother was there helping the process from the other side. I truly appreciate each and every one of the people that were there in that room- Grandpa Curtis, Grandpa Armstrong, Neil- just to name a few.
Keisha had a C-Section less than 24 hours before we got there and eventually she got tired and decided to have a nap. At that time we left with Anthony and were given our own room. Jodi came and talked to us for a bit and then left us alone to be parents. Steve and I took turns feeding Anthony- he was a big eater! Changing his diapers (a disaster the first time that ended up getting the entire bed soggy!) and cuddling with our new life.
Signing Papers
At 8:00 PM Jodi came to get us, she went over our part of the paper work and then we left Anthony in the nursery. Keisha was discharged and we met her and Cindy for dinner. Keisha brought her son Jeremiah with her to dinner. He is the cutest kid you have ever seen!! He looks exactly like Anthony. We ate at Golden Corral although not many of us ate much. During dinner Keisha told us that Anthony was her 5th pregnancy. She had two miscarriages, a still born and then Jeremiah. She believed that Jeremiah was her miracle. She then told us that when she found out she was pregnant again (when Jeremiah was only a few months old) she decided to abort the pregnancy because she knew she could not take care of another child. She went to the abortion clinic and as her hand gripped the door handle to go inside she felt the overwhelming feeling that she needed to carry the pregnancy to full term and to place the child for adoption in Utah. At that prompting she researched adoption agencies in Utah and found A Guardian Angel. She knew that her baby needed to be a miracle for someone that could not have children just like Jeremiah was her miracle. We truly feel blessed that Anthony is our miracle!
After dinner we went to the apartment where Keisha was staying and signed all of the paper work that made it official that Anthony was ours. When all the papers were signed Keisha came downstairs to where we were sitting, gave us a hug and said good bye. What trust she has to simply leave it up to us to raise her baby boy.
New Grandparents
We returned to the hospital, got Anthony out of the nursery and went back to our room. Our parents met us at the hospital that night at 11:00 PM to meet their grandson for the first time. We talked and everyone took the opportunity to hold him and take some pictures. We fed Anthony, changed his diaper (answering a question for my dad he had wondered since a very young age) and then tried to get some sleep. Anthony did great sleeping about 4 hours, eating and then the nurse took him to check and make sure everything was okay.
The next morning we woke up and sat around some more waiting to be discharged. We hadn't eaten much for dinner and didn't get any breakfast so we were starving come 2:00 PM when we finally got to go home. Luckily my parents met us at home with lunch and everyone got to hold Anthony. What a special blessing he is!
Here are a couple of our favorite pictures from the first days of Anthony's life. We feel so blessed to have him here!
Hunter so far is a great dog- he is learning how to sleep at night, some nights are better than others and he is learning to go potty outside! Hunter does not like the snow!!
As for Moco- she is adjusting to having her ears and jowls chewed on constantly and most of the time likes to play although 4:30 AM is not play time! Moco and I are sticking together as once again we are out-numbered by the boys :)
